Monday, 7 January 2013

Pangolin Top Tip: Good News for the Orthodontically Challenged!

Guys and Dolls!  Has your orthodontist informed you that you need dental braces on your teeth?

...and are you heartbroken because the only ones you can afford look like this?

So you have the indignity of looking like a geek, on top of all the discomfort of having a length of fusewire and radio components shackled to your
dental appendages.

And do you look at your classmates in envy? 

The ones whose parents are tax-avoiding scallywags with private health insurance, and add insult to injury with their cool, trendy dental appliances which may well be selected to match their latest outfit or football team? Do you look at dental braces like these, and turn green?

Cease those chlorophytic thoughts immediately!

The Pangolin can now reveal that your dental braces can be as much a vehicle of self-expression, at a fraction of the cost!

Yes, all you need to do is wear your braces as per usual, and munch your way through several portions of diced vegetables; the precise species according to your favoured colours of the moment.  If that sounds a bit healthy for you, then a packet of mixed vegetable soup mix should do the trick.  

And you too can have a multicoloured mouthpiece.  Like this one:

"Eee, it were great", said Maisie Tonkers (aged 9) from Witney Scrotum.  "I 'ad red peppers an' tomatoes an' that, an' I dint 'ave to tell nobody I were a United fan!"

"They spotted it straight away when ah kicked 'ole  in litter bin, pulled it off t' lamp post an threw it through t' winscreen of t' police car!  Reet good night out, it were!"


  1. Hmmm. I see that Madeley fellow has seen fit to comment. Research suggests that he makes a habit of writing to people without a formal introduction ! How below the salt can you get ?


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