Monday, 21 January 2013

Cameron and Clegg to stop Bathing!

Today, Parliament was taken by surprise when Prime Minister David Cameron announced that he, Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg and Chancellor George Osborne are soon to spend a week living in a local authority hostel and attempting to survive on the Job Seekers Allowance. 

Said Mr Cameron, “Look- let me make this perfectly clear – Nick, George and myself are acutely aware of the fact that none of us has ever wanted for anything, never had a proper job prior to politics, and are filthy rich to boot. Its obvious that this creates a huge gulf between us, the country’s ordained leaders and the great unwashed, some of whom, advisers tell me, are unemployed and are not even members of clubs. Clearly, this is an intolerable situation. I hope that our noble, and might I say courageous gesture will prove once and for all that we really are all in this together.”

As Mr Cameron sat down, the chamber erupted. The Speaker broke his gavel and several Masters at Arms were summoned. One member of the front bench, Mr Eric Pickles, collapsed and was removed by paramedics whilst muttering “Horseburgers! They’ll have to eat horseburgers!”

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