Pango Porn... or should that be Porno Pang?

Hundreds of you have written (mostly in green ink) about the lack of pornography on The Pangolin.  You arrive at this site, lured by promises like 'UK Magazine to Publish Nude Photos of Several People' only to find that nearly all the people have kept their clothes on.  Not only that, but their clothes consist of plus-fours, Sherlock Holmes style capes, wellington boots and camiknickers.  And that's just the blokes.

Sally-Ann Twatt (74) from Eastrington, Goole, is a typical moaner:  "Eeee... if I'd known that all I was going to be treated to were photos of earwigs, pictures of dust from a looney bin and small ads from people who look like they've escaped from t'looney bin... why, I'd sooner have cleared out ma understairs cupboard!"

Andrezj Hankipankiewicz (13) of Tooting is similarly unimpressed: "Write more, thats all I hаve to say. Literally, it seems as though you relіed on the videо tо make yоur роint. Υou obviouѕly know what youre talkіng about, whу wаѕte your іntellіgenсe on just posting vidеos to уour weblog when you could bе giving us something enlightenіng tο reаd?"

This one baffled us, as there's nobody on The Pangolin staff who knows how to work a video.  He must have been referring to that one of 'Chitty Chitty Bang Bang' which Murgatroyd found underneath the sofa cushion that time.

Some of you have clearly given up in despair, like Norman Chatterly-Penguin (14) from Totnes.  "I will watch out for brussels.  Meanwhile,  check out my website: 'The House of Commons Unfrocked'."

Of course, such a concerted campaign from our readers is not to be ignored, so here's the first of what promises to be a fruity series of postcards: