Tuesday, 10 September 2013

The Pangolin Guide to Coping with the Aged

By Prof P J Whimbrel

At a time when people are living longer – the average lifespan of, for example, a 14th century thripp crimper was about six minutes – great efforts are being made by various non-governmental agencies to develop devices and strategies which might help we young-ish non-loopy types cope with the average Wandering Wrinkly.

The first age related solution we tested is the Nonothisway exo-skeletal programmed direction suit, the Boomerang. Dr. Erica Phont, development Director at Nonothisway told me, “Basically the Boomerang is basically a remote controlled exoskeleton which basically can be programmed to only allow the wearer to follow basically pre-programmed domestic routes, which can be basically timed to coincide with observed personal needs. The Boomerang will always return to its point of departure, basically. “ 

We found the Boomerang worked well within the range of its electric flex, but fitting it to the wearer was very fiddly. See illus. from Boomerang users’ guide below.

1 comment:

  1. My husband has got dementure. At first I thouht he was just a bit loopy like old folk get but the docters all say he has demneture. So I got him one of the Boomrenang things and sowed zips into the back of his pants, shirt and cradigan. It took me ages to get him in it. I bought the one with the 5 kilometer flex. Bomerang does not work. I havenot seen my husband for three weeks.
    Yrs Truly,
    Hilda Pennington [Mrs., 74]


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