Bogwort Down the Pan - Again!

Darren O'Bogwort: "I'm acksherly a sensitive New Age Guy an' I like poetry an' everyfink."

Darren O' Bogwort, well-known local bailiff and Parliamentary Candidate for the latest Right-Wing-Splinter-Group-but-we-don't-know-what-it's-called-yet - has hit the headlines once again!

Last year, O'Bogwort (17) had been photographed attending orgies and seemed to relish the notoriety - until it was pointed out that the so-called 'orgy scene' was nothing more than a photographic backdrop generally used by contributors to the Readers' Wives page in Norks Monthly. He strenuously denied the allegation, saying that it was "A proper orgy and everyfink an' anyway they're just jealous!"

However, it had been alleged that his tattoos feature Nazi regalia, but he was advised to deny this by his party leader, Obergruppenführer Bang. Reading from a prepared statement, he explains his tattoos thus:

"The one whot looks like a swastika is in fact a very ancient symbol and you get it in Buddhism, Hinduism and Jainism. At least that's what it says on Wikipedia. So yar boo sucks to all you lot.

The tattoo which looks like an eagle whot was a symbol of the Third Reich is in fact a dove of peace. OK OK it's a crap drawing.

Then you lot said that I had a tattoo which says 'Let us prey' well actually clever clogs it says 'Lettuce spray' and that's what I got for my mum for her birthday because she was getting dead narked with all the greenfly in her salad."

When questioned further, he admitted that they weren't really tattoos at all, but the work of his mate Bazzer, who had drawn them on with biro for a bet.

They were no longer on view since he had had his annual bath since this photo was taken.