Thursday, 12 May 2016

Pangolin Newsflash!

Glossop Secretary sent home with No Supper for refusing to wear Bondage Gear at work

Legal secretary Gertrude Peng (78) has been sent home with no pay from her £8,500 per annum job with Greebo, Perv and Leer Solicitors of Glossop. It has emerged that the directors of this legal firm made it a requirement that their staff should be 'appropriately dressed', and Eggbert Greebo (142) told The Pangolin that it was important the clients should realise that high standards of discipline and restraint were paramount in this company. Of course, being a legal firm, they have totally failed to issue any contracts of employment and have since denied that they'd ever seen Ms Peng.
© Raimond Spekking / CC BY-SA 4.0 (via Wikimedia Commons)

"It was awful", Ms Peng told The Pangolin. "How was I supposed to do my nails and stare out of the window dressed like that?"

Unfortunately, her troubles have not ended there. Her sorry tale of working as a receptionist at Cadaver, Necro and Cadaver Funeral Parlour of Wincy Street, Bletchington, will be covered (or uncovered) in a future article.


  1. Huh. Got this all wrong. Thought it said "bandage gear"

    Wayne Prosser [paramedic]

  2. I would very much like to meet the young lady in the photograph.
    J Whittingdale

    1. Gerroff you filthy pervert!

      I should like you to know that I am first in the queue to make her acquaintance. And I can pay handsomely, in cash.

      Obadiah J Nerd

  3. I am not a pervert although I do have an interest in early English knotted string.
    Polly Pants
    pp J Whittingdale


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