Monday, 3 August 2015

Pangolin Newsflash: Hipster of the Black Lagoon mystery solved

Dramatic pictures emerged yesterday of a search party's amazing discovery at local beauty spot Filth Pond, near Langley's Bottom, Glossop.  Said Team Leader Samantha Kerb: "We've always believed in the hipster legend. It's spotted from time to time and, as you can see, it's a distressing sight. But up till now, it's always managed to evade us."

Local Social Services spokesperson Aubrey Spanner added "The team did a great job coaxing the hipster out of the water with lattes and real ale. He (we think it's a male) will now be taken to Chester Zoo for evaluation."


  1. It was probly has been hidign in that big choob
    Kelli McStruth [15]

  2. The marine hipster is a relatively rare, harmless creature and I strongly suggest that well-meaning interventions like the above are ill-advised. Removing a marine hipster from its chosen habitat may well interrupt its life cycle. After all, it is common knowledge that left to their own devices, eventually marine hipsters leave the water voluntarily and migrate south to Camden Town to join resident herds of other hipsters, there to stride about looking cool.
    Your etc.,
    Dr P J Whimbrel
    University of Glossop
    Nollidge Way,


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